Three days later I was taken in to hospital to be induced. Later that day, I gave birth to a very healthy 10lb 3oz baby. I took one look at him and knew instantly that he was amazing. Within a minute of him being born, I noticed that one of his toes was a little 'odd'. It had 2 nails and was in the shape of a hammer. This did not matter, if anything, it made me love him all the more. I never even imagined that anything else may be wrong.
The next few weeks following, my new baby amazed me all the more. He fed well and slept extremely well, through the night and I even had to wake hi for feeds in the day.
A couple of months later, I noticed his eyes were wobbling all of the time. I assumed it was him trying to focus but after numerous people pointed it out to me, I spoke to me health visitor about it. She advised me to see the doctor and he then referred me to a paediatrician.
The months following, I was informed that he had something called congenital nystagmus and that he had to see an eye specialist regularly and he needed a brain MRI scan to rule out anything serious. They mentioned that it could take him a while to start walking at first as he may not have full vision to see where he is going. Meanwhile, Archie was having regular developmental checks with is doctor at the hospital and I realised he was not hitting a lot of milestones of which both my elder two children, Georgia and Luke hit. He wasn't rolling, couldn't crawl and couldn't sit up unaided.
Whilst all of this was happening, me and my now ex husband split and this added increasing pressure to me. I was back at work full time and wondering where life would take me next.
Eleven months after his birth, I received the results of his scan and the doctors told me that he also had cerebral palsy. I didn't know what to think, I didn't understand why and neither did I know what I should now do.
I handed my notice in at work that day as the one thing I did know was that I wanted to be the best mum and carer he could have and I needed to make sure he was cared for the way I wanted.
Over the next year, I was referred to many different services and taking in so much information about my child's condition/disability was a whirlwind.
Georgia and Luke have both been amazing in understanding that Archie had additional needs although I do sometimes worry that they miss out a bit on the attention they deserve.
I now feel I have my head screwed on. That tiny baby that was born 3 years ago is now due to start nursery in September this year. He has mobility needs, and he still has a lot of vocabulary to find although his signing of Makaton is amazing. Far better than I ever imagined. I have been told that socially and cognitively he has the ability of a 4 to 5 year old yet he is still 3 days off turning 3.
He is probably the most amazing child I have ever met and yes, I know I would say that because he is my son but he has such a fascinating nature that I would not change him for the world.
I still get upset from time to time, wishing he didn't have to try so hard at everything he attempts to do, in fact I shed a few tears today because I knew how hot the weather was yet he still needed his socks to his knees,his leg splints on and on top of that I added leg gaiters. I wished I could let his run free in shorts and trainers but I know for the foreseeable future, that won't be.
Everyone around us have given so much support and I would like to take the opportunity to thank them for it all. To my amazing new partner, my amazing family, (specially my sisters and my grandpa) and my amazing friends for being there when all I needed was a hug or somebody to ramble on to. Thanks!
The person I need to thank most of all for helping me through the last 3 years is Archie himself, without his smiles, his hugs and his unbelievable determination to cope with everything his daily life throws at him, I would have crumbled. I most certainly would not be the person I am today without him. I feel so lucky to have him in my life.
x
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